How To Destroy Your Enemies
By Bill Valine
Mephibosheth had a young son whose name was Micah. – 2 Samuel 9:12
In his Roadside History of Arizona, Marshall Trimble relates this intriguing adventure:
In 1849, Lieutenant Amiel Whipple was leading a team responsible for surveying the boundary between Mexico and the United States from San Diego to the Colorado River. While near the future site of Yuma, Arizona, Whipple met a native girl wandering lost in the desert and gave her food and water.
In 1851, Whipple was back in Arizona to work on the Gila River boundary survey. Between Whipple’s two expeditions, a gang of thugs led by one John Glanton had been abusing the Yumas and robbing immigrants.
As the survey party arrived at Fort Yuma, they were greeted by fifteen hundred angry Yuma warriors who threatened to wipe out the surveyors. The situation was turned from tense to friendly when a young girl recognized Whipple as the man who had saved her life two years before. The Yumas then gave Whipple’s party supplies and escorted them across the desert towards San Diego.
Lieutenant Whipple experienced firsthand the benefits of adhering to the wisdom of Abraham Lincoln: “Do I not destroy my enemy when I make him my friend?”
Our Natural Tendency
Making an enemy a friend goes against our self-centered nature. It is more common for us to hold a grudge against those whom we perceive to have slighted us.
The famous feud between the Hatfields and the McCoys lasted from 1863 to 1891. It started during the Civil War and was reportedly caused in part by disputes over land and a single hog. The feud also included fierce fighting over a Hatfield boy having fallen in love with a McCoy girl. These causes appear trivial when set against the 60 lives that the feud cost over a period of some 28 years. It reminds us of Romeo and Juliet, whose story Shakespeare crafted around the enmity between the Montagues and the Capulets.
No, we would rather eliminate our enemies than make them our friends. Often the first thing a new king does is eliminate the old regime by killing off the previous royal family. When Baasha became king he killed all the house of Jeroboam (1Kings 15: 29); Zimri in turn killed off the house of Baasha (1Kings 16: 11); and Jehu killed off the house of Ahab (2 Kings 9:24 and 2 Kings 10:11).
The Results
Granted, these are extreme cases. Usually, the offended party simply nurses a grudge. But it has been said that a grudge is a poison that kills the poisoner rather than the one he set out to poison. Nursing a grudge robs you of peace; it robs you of happiness as the grudge consumes you - and often the one against whom you hold the grudge is blissfully unaware of your inner torment!
A grudge also gives the devil access to our lives. The life of King Saul is a sobering example for us all. When he was young, he did not feel he would make a very good king (1 Samuel 10: 20-22). Later, he forgot that the throne was God’s, not his (1 Samuel 15:17).
After God had said he would take the kingdom from Saul for his disobedience, rather than humbling himself before God, Saul began to see everyone around him as a threat - including his own son Jonathan (1 Samuel 20:30-33). His paranoia robbed him of peace (1 Samuel 16:14). His resentment and fear were especially focused on David, as he saw the anointing of God on him to replace him as king (1 Samuel 18:5-12).
A Better Way
Jonathan was the Crown Prince. The throne of Israel was his to inherit. But he knew that God would take the kingdom away from his father Saul and give it to another (1 Samuel 15: 27-28). He recognized God’s hand was upon David.
Rather than viewing David as an enemy and a threat, Jonathan chose to see him as a friend (1 Sam 18:1-3). He was willing to forgo his claim to the throne in order to support David (1 Samuel 18:4). Did not Jonathan destroy his enemy when he made David his friend? And Jonathan reaped amazing benefits from his befriending David.
“It has been said that a grudge is a poison that kills the poisoner rather than the one he set out to poison.”
Jonathan showed kindness to David when Saul sought to kill him. All he asked in return was that David show kindness to him and his family: “And you shall not only show me the kindness of the Lord while I still live, that I may not die; but you shall not cut off your kindness from my house forever, no, not when the Lord has cut off every one of the enemies of David from the face of the earth” (1 Samuel 20:14-15).
Years later, after David was established on his throne, he asked if there was anyone left in Jonathan’s family to whom he could show the kindness of the Lord. He was told that Jonathan’s son Mephibosheth was living with Machir in Lo Debar (2 Samuel 9:3-4). Now after his grandfather and father fell in battle, and his uncle Ishbosheth was murdered, Mephibosheth was in line to inherit the throne of his grandfather, Saul.
This should have put not only Mephibosheth, but anyone who aided him, such as Machir, in mortal danger. Instead of treating Mephibosheth and all who were helping him as threats, David showed him the kindness of the Lord. David told Mephibosheth, “Do not fear, for I will surely show you kindness for Jonathan your father’s sake, and will restore to you all the lands of Saul your grandfather; and you shall eat bread at my table continually” (2 Samuel 9:1-7).
One detail of this story is that Mephibosheth had a son named Micah. This is remarkable in that Mephibosheth was lame in both feet - as his nurse fled with five year old Mephibosheth after hearing that Saul and his sons were killed in battle against the Philistines (1Samuel 31:1-6), she accidentally dropped him and he became lame (2 Samuel 4:4).
From then on, he was dependent on others to take care of him. For him to have a son meant that he was cared for by others for years, by Machir and by David. Jonathan’s kindness to David was returned to him many times over. Through Micah, Saul’s lineage (and therefore, Jonathan’s) has been traced for twelve generations! (1 Chronicles 9:39-44).
Our Obligation and Debt
Why should we treat our enemies as friends? Because Jesus requires it of us: “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven” (Matthew 5:43-45).
In addition, we should treat our enemies as friends because that is what Jesus has done for us! “For if when we were enemies we were reconciled to God through the death of his Son, much more, having been reconciled, we shall be saved by his life” (Romans 5:10).
“And you, who once were alienated and enemies in your mind by wicked works, yet now he has reconciled in the body of his flesh through death, to present you holy and blameless, and above reproach in his sight (Colossians 1:21).
In John 1:12 it says we have been transformed from enemies of God to being part of God’s family; John 15:13-15 tells us we have become Jesus’ friends; and Romans 8:15-17 says we are adopted heirs with Jesus! To not make our enemies our friends is to fail to show appreciation for the very thing God has done for us!
Why should we treat our enemies as friends? Because you never know when your kindness will be returned to you (Matthew 5:7). David’s kindness was definitely returned to him. When he fled from Absolam, one of those who aided him was Machir, the son of Amiel, the very person he did not kill for supporting his enemies, but rather showed him mercy - and mercy was shown by him to David in return (2 Samuel 17:27-29).
Do you want peace in your home? Do you want to leave a legacy for your children? Forgive your enemies (Matthew 6:14); be kind to your enemies -- they won’t know how to handle it (Romans 12:9-21); pray for your enemies (you cannot hate someone you are praying for - Matthew 5:44). If you do, Jesus has promised that your reward, here and in the hereafter, will be great (Matthew 5:11-12).