Are We Still in the Race?

By Alyssa Baca

For the past two years, I have been the stay-at-home mom for two girls under five.

My new slower pace has shown me how heavily I had previously relied on outside factors like school and work to set my schedule and habits. Without someone to tell me what to do or where to be, my life’s routines were failing.

Not that I had perfect routines; in fact, I mostly had convenient excuses as to why I couldn’t keep to a routine and do simple tasks – like keeping up with the laundry, budgeting, cooking, and cleaning bathrooms.

I used to think of myself as a disciplined person. Motherhood has taught me that I have a lot to learn – and a lot to put into practice. What a humbling experience it has been!

I decided to confront my deficiencies head-on. I searched online for the perfect housekeeping to-do list and the perfect daily routine that included a nap for my youngest at predictable times. I felt confident that if I only knew a little more, I could get everything done properly.

But soon I found myself repeatedly searching Google for the same answers time after time; reading the same articles over and over again. It occurred to me that my real problem was me. I had trouble making a plan and sticking with it.

In short, I had trouble creating good habits. I had trouble being a disciplined person.

The Bible uses the analogy of running a race to discuss discipline, self-control, and endurance.

In 1 Corinthians 9:25, the Apostle Paul says, “Every athlete exercises self-control in all things. They do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable.”

Hebrews 12:1-2 says “Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and the sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.”

To run my race, I need discipline. Perhaps I was staying busy, learning more, and improving my abilities, but these things alone weren’t helping me to build the healthy home habits I desired.

I discovered that knowledge, ability, and busyness are not synonyms for discipline.

Discipline is not knowledge. If I were to run a race, I would have to know some important things. For example, where does the race begin and end; what is the length of the race; what strategies might contribute to a successful run. But even if I knew everything about that race, that knowledge wouldn’t get me even one step from the starting line.

Discipline is not ability. Yes, running a race does require skill and ability. Some people, like my brother, have a natural aptitude for running; other people, like me, do not. But if we were to race one another, all of his ability would not help him win if he never started running, or if he got sidetracked and stopped. And my lack of ability would not keep me from winning, as long as I began running and stuck with it. (Are you getting a Tortoise-and-Hare vibe?)

Discipline is not busyness. At a race, you might stay busy doing other things that aren’t running, such as organizing the runners, cheering, or socializing. This reminds me of how my 4-year-old daughter can find so many other things to do – good things! – when I ask her to pick up her clothes and toys from the floor. She’s just not getting the important job done.

Discipline requires action, but not just action for action’s sake. Focused and repeated action toward the ultimate goal is what we need. Once we make a choice informed by our knowledge and experience and wisdom, we must continue to practice that good choice.

Choosing to start and then to continue is the pattern that builds perseverance and endurance. Here is where character is found. It is found in the drudgery and dullness of running; of putting one foot in front of the other over and over again.

It is literally one small step, completed day after day, until we find ourselves at the finish line.

The concept is simple, but the effects over time are profound.

This is how a sinner becomes a disciple and goes on to become a pastor. This is how parents raise godly children who grow into a multigenerational family of believers.

This is how our local church was planted and has grown into a fifty-year worldwide legacy of blessing and impact.

We can’t forget to start – and to continue – working toward the prize. Don’t be distracted by the details. Focus on the race. It will benefit both you and your children.

Proverbs 25:28 tells us that a person who lacks self-discipline is like a city with broken down walls. Being undisciplined leaves us and our family vulnerable to trouble and evil influences.

Children are watching, listening, and learning by the example we show them.

How can we train children in self-control if we do not demonstrate it for them? Many worldly influences are teaching the opposite of self-control, so it is imperative that we give our children godly examples of self-control to emulate.

One small change I made to my routine was to begin sweeping up under the table after dinner each evening. After watching me do this small task consistently for a little while, my eldest daughter grabbed the broom one evening and did the chore without me asking her to.

It's a small win, but it's enough to encourage me because I see that she is paying attention.

These small choices matter. In my home, I hope to set an example of Christ-centered self-discipline for my children to learn from and follow.

This is possible through God, “for the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love, and self-discipline” (2 Timothy 1:7).

So, now when I’m overwhelmed by the chores of the day ahead and I’m tempted to search Google for the hundredth time to find the perfect daily housecleaning or napping or homeschooling schedule; when I feel tempted to rip up the current plan and start over from scratch yet again – I’ve determined to ask myself: Am I honestly lacking in knowledge or ability to complete this task, or am I running from the drudgery of practice?

Paul said, “Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me – put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you” (Philippians 4:9).

Here is a secret: Self-control is one of the fruits of the Spirit. Galatians 5:22 tells us, “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law.”

Fruit is not something that we can compel a tree to give by imposing conditions on it from the outside. It naturally grows out from what is inside, and so will the fruit of the Spirit, as we give place in our hearts to His working inside us.

But we must work with Him, praying, yielding to Him, giving that fruit time to grow.

Through Christ, we have the power to demonstrate self-control, along with all the fruit of the Spirit that He will bring forth in our lives and our children’s. So, let’s keep running.